Thursday, November 13, 2008

Tutorial For Men: Why Women Give Out Fake Phone Numbers

I've received lots of requests to post this, and I actually posted it back in July, our first month to go live.

Here's the original post, along with the stupid rookie commentary I left back when WWHM wore diapers.




I'd call this guy a horse's ass, but I have more respect for the actual anus of a horse than I do for this guy. And the last thing I want is another horse anus upset with me. (Um....long story.)

Anyway, at least a horse's anus has an excuse for spouting shit as horrible as this. That's because the horse anus has one job and one job only: to release shit.

"I'm not a jazzercise instructor, I'm a horse anus, " the horse anus might say.

Good point, horse anus.

This guy on the other hand, has NO excuse for the shit he spouts.

Two words: Restraining. Order.

73 comments:

Le Liu said...

Holy jesus titty-fucking Christ!!!! What a friggin' psycho!!! How did you find this crazy ass message!?

Le Liu said...

Apparently this guy is really popular on the net. I found another blog about him. His identity might've been revealed. Poor fella hahaha!!!
http://contexts.org/socimages/2008/07/03/details-on-dmitri-the-lover/#comment-2080

wheelin126 said...

WOW!!!! I loved the 3 o'clock deadline WTF?!?!? What an ego maniac, control freak....Run lady...Run!!!

~CRUNCHBERRYS MOM~ said...

wtf? psycho much???

BunnyGeek said...

that can't be real!!

Unknown said...

Wowwowwowwowwow.......... Friggin psycho. I hope this is fake...

Anonymous said...

OMG! I'm ashamed to say that he's from my hometown.

oh lord. *hangs head in shame*

anniebanannie said...

What a crazy condescending dickweed...

.Mix said...

area code 416 is Ontario, Canada.

Probably Toronto or Ottawa

The Hatter said...

O_o

Unknown said...

I was almost speachless "not easy"
Then I thought, Sure wish he would call me!!!! Jack ass needs an eye opener. He is under the grand illusion if he doesn't get a call back it is the womans fault and she has a prblem. Gay looks better and better all the time

Lagniappe said...

No...my favorite...
"maybe your mother is having chemo or you have issues..."
WTF????

Someone give him a mirror please so he can see what an ass he is.

Wooly Witchy said...

WOW what a PSYCHO! I'd call the COPS.

Anonymous said...

OMH MY GOD WHAT AN ARSEHOLE!!!!!. GOOD JOB SHE FOUND OUT BEFORE HAND EH!!!

CaliGirl9 said...

What a fucktard! He could be the most gorgeous thing on earth and he's a class A egotistical dillweed.

Beware when they claim to be "a complete catch" or "I have nothing wrong with me" or he diagnoses a mental disorder over the answering machine.

YOU look up passive aggressive, buttmunch. THEN look in the mirror. Actually he's probably borderline ...

nosey said...

Respect the cock!
Tame the cunt!

Oh shit, I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Merridyn said...

CaliGirl9- I like the borderline theory, but I think I also see lots of narcissistic PD here. Lets see what we've got...

Need for constant admiration from others

extremely inflated self esteem, but not self-generated. always seeking it from other people, hence the belief that women oggle him 6 or 7 times a day

lack of respect for others rights, i.e. the right not to have your tape filled up with his egotistical drivel.

the assumption that those who do not admire him are flawed

attributing one's own failures to others. he's convinced that he, the complete catch, has handled this perfectly, while she, the flawed mere mortal has effed it up by not responding "correctly."

I think we have a a real charmer with at least 2 personality disorders.

Anonymous said...

You know what they say about ASSuming
What a nut!

NYCowgirl said...

I totally second the Narcissistic Personality D/O diagnosis...HE should look THAT up...

Malecasta said...

416 - that's a Toronto number... it all makes sense now.

.Tanni. said...

I just found my new addiction.. This website!! =D

All I can say about this is - lol Wow!!!

Rakasha said...

This is a delayed reaction, I've heard this before and this guy has a whole site about himself that I've seen before. Pretty wacky to say the least.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, that guy was a jerk. I shut off the message when it was about one quarter finished. However, if you think it's okay to give a man a fake phone number, you're just as big a jerk as he is.

Anonymous said...

So embarrassed to be Canadian *hangs head in shame*

Anonymous said...

gag - just checked out http://www.dimitrithelover.com/

"Viewing this web site may cause Gender Identity Crisis in both lesbians and gay men" - fuck that, I think both groups are celebrating!

If you can stomach more, check out "dog like submission" with tips for women including rubbing your c--- on him in lieu of humping his leg. WTF?!?

Anonymous said...

This has to be fake...nobody could really fall for this crap could they?

"Dimitri The Lover’s powerful techniques were so successful in causing women to worship him, that he had to found his own religion in order to manage them, by setting worshiper/Prophet boundaries."

Weasel said...

On his website, he also bashes gays. He's a real fucking bucket of charm.

He also offers "free" sex lessons to attractive women.

Punksauce.

Anonymous said...

Weasel-
re: spouting shit as horrible as this.

Many readers of your blog think horse shit smells heavenly. There can be no comparison to the low level of this guy and ANYTHING that emits from a horse.

Thingsthatperplexme said...

I am so glad I didn't run into him in toronto last month.

then again, i'm probably too fat for his tastes. Fortunately, my horse's ass makes mine look small ;) (and it's not a draft, lol)

The Half-Assed Blog said...

Horse shit smells WONDERFUL compared to the l'eau du douchebag that this guy is emitting.

Wake-up call Dimitri: no one is normal. Everyone has a quirk. Some are more screwed-up than others.
And then, there are people like Dimitri that make everyone else look remarkably sane by comparison...

TornadoBaby said...

OMG... I agree with the narcissism diagnosis... my mother isn't nearly that bad, but there are definitely undertones.
I'd call him back just to leave a scathing reply, even if it did nothing for him, lol.

RebelJubilee said...

he's worse than mr. I doubt you could handle me, though (see: my blog)

I vote we gather the douchebags of the world all together at the next tattoo convention and have their douche status posted on their foreheads, save us women some time.

Brandy said...

In his second diatribe, of COURSE he never even dares to suggest she might be a lesbian. Because that would mean his amazing gaydar isn't so amazing...

"I'm Greek" Reminds me of a joke!

The new husband whispers to his bride "Honey, roll over...." She answers, "My mother says you're Greek, and that I don't have to 'roll over' if I don't want to!"

"I totally respect that, my darling, but... don't you want children?"

I need a shower. With bleach and steel wool. I met a LOT of these arrogant pricks between the military and the cowboy crowds...

There's no arguing with them. There's no pleasing them outside of them getting their rocks off. There's no future with them. They do NOT know anything about anything.

Glad he's outed, now I hope the place he works for avoids their own legal troubles and fires him, censures him, anything to keep him away from women!

Unknown said...

Anon., 1/2Assed--agreed. As much as I wonder why my horse can't wait 'til he's back in his stall to dump, at least it's nothing toxic...just thought of something: it's hard to believe my well-bred, doe-eyed boy could ever be anything but a cool customer--until one of his breeders told me what a PITA he was as a colt and how he screamed and hollered and acted out, esp. when stallions were there. My horse is a gelding, so you can see the brain surgery did _wonders_ towards making him a polite and productive member of society.

They use rubberbands now, don't they?

Anonymous said...

No wonder his last relationship was long distance. No distance would be far enough and I live in Australia.

Duske said...

What's creepy is I decided to listen to this guy on Ebaums world last night. I "introduced" him to a friend and then decided to do some background on him to see whether or not the voice mail was a fake, only to find out it wasn't.

Then I see you did the exact same thing. I can say it with confidence, the Weasel absolutely is in tune with women. LOL!

Ah man, what a douchebag! I wonder how he feels being the laughing stock of a nation full of women? I sure hope that prissy accent of his is fake, what a turn off!

Rhyadawn said...

"They use rubberbands now, don't they?"

I watched a standing castration done a few days ago (brain surgery for the weaners!!!) and it was still slice and dice.

Unknown said...

duske falling...
What accent? He sounds Canadian enough to me.

Oh, and definitely narcissistic. And suffering from acute entitlementitis.

Anonymous said...

WHAT
THE
FUCK.

What an asshole.

Yes, 416 is a Toronto area code.

I'm ashamed to be Canadian... :(

Anonymous said...

Some old school vets/farmers use rubberbands to castrate barn dogs/cats. I've never heard it done on horses though?
All the standing castrations I've been involved in (many, and recently) were all slice and dice.

Brandy said...

These horndogs think that REAL manliness is having hawt wet secks with as many women as they can convince.

But the true man is the one in the long-term committed relationship with one other person. Both are sexually fulfilled by each other, and attracted to each other on many levels besides the mere physical. The depth of caring and the true knowledge of your partner(s) is what makes a sensual encounter truly awesome!

The largest sexual organ after the skin is the brain. Satisfy that, and you have satisfied your partner. I firmly believe that is why geeks and nerds make far better lovers than any self professed Lothario, or any graduate of these so called dating courses.

I don't know, is the thrill of the new so great that a man can be satisfied with that for his entire life? Although I know that the male of most species is supposed to want to spread his genetic material as far as he can, it is also to their advantage to see their offspring raised, instead of playing the odds.

And outside of reproduction, wouldn't you feel so lonely, working to get a girl's attention, and get into her knickers, and then getting her out of your apartment? So sad! So pathetic!

searching_for_something said...

hahahahahaha love it

Anonymous said...

I am extremely insulted just by listening to this idiot, and I would have called him back by his deadline, made up some excuse, and gone out to meet him just so I could punch him in the face.

Zelika said...

For everyone that thinks it fake, It might be, I don't know BUT I used to train horses for a lady that would have LOVED this guy. I don't know what it is with her, but this is exactly the type of guy she brings around all the time. She's actually played similar messages for me and showed me emails from guys that are shockingly weird. Although I guess thats the kind of guy you're looking for when you join dateamillionare.com

So to answer your question, yes there are guys out there who are actually like that

Anonymous said...

This guy isn't just weird, he's dangerous:


Dmitri the Lover's History of Sexual Assault

E.A.D. said...

This guy keeps setting off my "KILL IT WITH FIRE!" alarm. If, as has been suggested elsewhere, he does use gel on his chest hair, he's already highly flammable. I'm going to be on the lookout when I visit Toronto - because I want to avoid this "man" as much as possible.

Nancy said...

There's a reason my current main sexual fantasy is a nice, reasonable guy who is eager to enter into a mutually fulfilling relationship with me.

God, the world is full of fucking douchebags.

Anonymous said...

Wow.... I'm pretty sure HE's the one with the psychological disorder. He starts giving her deadlines like it's some sort of business deal. It wasn't 'passive aggressive' of her to not call him back, it was self fucking defense. Creeeeeeep

613 is Ottawa, at least the downtown Ottawa area, and he said he met her on the street so I'm going to cross my fingers that it's T.O

Unknown said...

Oh. my. god.



Maybe hes the one who should look up passive agressive disorder!!!!!

VA Prisoner said...

Dude...She's Just Not That Into You

Escort London said...

I used to subscribe on online dating newsletter which I found really interesting. I am now on my mid 30s and I really want to find my soulmate. I subscribed on tons of online dating site and read tons of newsletter for the tips to apply whenever I go out for a date

Monica said...

I got stressed, just hearing the messages.

The way he talks, it sounds like he's one step away from los-ing it.

"Look up passive aggressive," He says. I say, 'Look up 'condescending asshole'.

Wow.

Anonymous said...

I would call him back with a list of personality disorders and enough medication names to do a pharmacy proud. "Guess I'm just not the woman you deserve, too bad."

Dating said...

I vote we gather the douchebags of the world all together at the next tattoo convention.

Manchester Escorts Bolton said...

These days guys don't even need phone numbers. A name will do if the girl is on facebook!

Asian London escorts said...

fake or not?

Anonymous said...

Man, Weasel, why did you have to edit out his phone number/ I'm not generally into phone (or other) harassment. I'm actually pretty dang tolerant of most folks. But Dimitri just BEGS to get some of his own medicine! It'd even be worth the long distance phone call to Canada!

Asian Escorts london said...

it all makes sense now.
I Like it!

Asian escorts said...

Holy jesus titty-fucking Christ!!!! What a friggin' psycho!!! How did you find this crazy ass message!?


LOLO LOLO

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