Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Asshole


Looking to share?

I m 27 year-old Asian male. Skinny 120lb 5-7. Most of my pictures have face. All naked. some pics are hard. If you want pictures/Video, please email Victor. female only

Yes, I'd like to share something with you.

Do you know that I just prepared a lovely dinner?

I made a nice steak, some rice pilaf, and dare I say it, a tossed salad. I sat down to check my email, opened your file, and up popped your lovely personal ad.

It was like getting smashed in the face with a broth-covered oven door.

There aren't any donkeys with halitosis around here, but someone certainly needs an ass mint.

When women say they want to see your ass Victor, they mean your ass, not your fucking pancreas. If this is the kind of photo you post to meet women, I'd hate to see what's on top of your fireplace. A photo of Dad's scrotum? A good ol' black-n-white of grandma's labia? A snapshot of Uncle Joe's pubic clippings?

Do me a favor, and DON'T send me a Christmas card.

If anyone wants my brownie, they can have it.

28 comments:

Cut-N-Jump said...

Good lord where's the swirly too when you need it most?

Thank you Weasel for at least NOT putting that one up there first.

Weasel said...

Yeah, think I should swirl?

HillBill said...

Aaaargh no mentioning swirling in reference to that picture! Ack ack ack!

Weasel said...

It's been properly swirled.

Good point hillbill. Didn't even think of that.

Nosnikta said...

ROFLMAO! I nearly jumped off my chair AT the twirl-tool because at first glance I thought that WAS his asshole.

Scared the crap out of me. If I had a twirl tool on my butt, it would be a matter of the crap falling out of me.

Rachel said...

gross. Thats all I can even think of. Just...gross. I must go puke now.

Nosnikta said...

LOL.... Weasel said "labia" (snort)

K Darling said...

For a second I thought the swirl was a very large vagina...

Cut-N-Jump said...

Thank you swirl tool Gods! Although I'm not sure it makes it any better.

Now it reminds me of a handful of 'fun size' Baby Ruth bars circling the bowl!

Weasel said labia? I couldn't even read the text with the thought of that lone brown eye staring at me.

I will try, armed with sticky notes now...

Cut-N-Jump said...

Maybe this guy and Steve the Handy Man with his hommade tools, constructed using an erector set can get together and concockt something they can both use.

I'm thinking a penis guillotine of sorts... It would ease my mind at least, knowing these two are busy with themselves and 'off the streets' if you will.

Anonymous said...

That's not the kind of ad you place to get a woman, unless maybe you're into pegging.
Thank you, Weasel, I'm going blind now.

Nosnikta said...

ROFLMAO! My blonde is showing through and I just got the part about the donkey and the mint LMAO! Gawd, sometimes I scare myself :-)

The Half-Assed Blog said...

I'm thinking this is the end that this guy SEES out of, if you know what I mean.

Mack Truck said...

I'm confused, really.

WHY would some idjit think we women want to look at his asshole?

Now if he were trolling for gay guys, I could understand it. Still wouldn't think it appropriate, but would understand.

Cut-N-Jump said...

OMG! With the addition of the swirls, this guy looks like he has a bent pecker like we were discussing the other day! ROFL!

wheelin126 said...

LMFAO!! Hey I can see his colon!! Maybe he should hook up with Mr Draws circle in the snow with his ass cause that was also a REAL turn on too!! Maybe he was just trying to show us women that he is into cleanliness as no dingle berries hanging there or...um....wait a minute I think I see one!! Hey he missed a spot!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ok...
He has to be in denial and is really gay. Why on earth would he think that women would like this "you can see what I had for breakfast" pose?

Chezza said...

Hey idiot....those women you overheard talking about playing CORNHOLE at a family reunion were NOT talking about this. Get a clue!

Nosnikta said...

When I see this photo, I swear I can hear the ocean.

Cut-N-Jump said...

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is what we call a mangina.

It looks similar to a womans vagina, but since this guy is such a pussy we just couldn't refer to it with the same terms...

wheelin126 said...

I could have sworn I heard the sonar pinging sound of gaydar going off!! Hey all you big boys out there lookey lookey at what I have for you ;)

Nosnikta said...

REALLY big boys.. boys.. boys... boys (hear the echo?)

4thehorses said...

he's looking for that 2x4!!! And, why do guys equate their assholes with vaginas? I mean, an asshole is NOT a "sweet little pussy", sorry dudes....

Nosnikta said...

LMAO... "Here kitty kitty!"

Unknown said...

Good googa mooga. If this is what he posts to meet women, what do you think he'll post to meet men?!

As the old Tootsie Pop commercial said, "The world may never know".

Cut-N-Jump said...

Wheelin and Nos- If this were his mug shot, he would be apopular man- in jail...

Unknown said...

i'll take the brownie

Anonymous said...

This is so very old, but I just wanted to comment saying I hope this guy grows a pair soon and just posts in the M4M section.