This weather is just blah. Don't really want to do anything productive. Want to meet for a drink and fuck like they do on the Discovery Channel?
Looks like someone has some free time, an oxygen-starved penis, and a spare key to Walt's Costume Bazaar.
Meet Blue Satin, a putridly disgusting superhero who inflicts upon his enemies the mind-boggling power of overwhelming nausea.
I don't know about you, but if I was running down the street after a jewelry heist and ran into a thunder-thighed Discovery Channel enthusiast with a purple semi-asphyxiated anteater snout seeping out of his clown trousers like a common vine snake, I'd turn and run until I reached outer Buenos Aires, where I'd build a hut in the llanos, change my name to Felix Algerrios Pueniros, and spend eternity eating weevils and stabbing my eyeballs with palm fronds.
Blue Satin 1, Weasel 0.
So what part of this ad is supposed to attract women?
The dialogue? It tells us you're unmotivated, there's a cold front in the area, and you paid your Comcast bill. If that alone got guys laid, I wouldn't be sitting here knee-deep in Bulgarian transsexual hookers.
The photo? That photo just made 3,000 vaginas seal tighter than the open end of a plastic sandwich bag inserted into a boiling hot Wal-Mart hair crimper.
You don't need that tiny weapon Blue Satin.
To women, you're already fucking kryptonite.