Friday, August 15, 2008

Welcome WWHM Readers!

Welcome once again from WWHM Headquarters, located in beautiful downtown Dubuque, Iowa right across from Wing C of Tom's Animal Rendering Plant!

You know, there's nothing I love more than sharing with my new readers the type of quality individuals we study here at WWHM.

See this guy?

This guy is a catch compared to most the guys I post on this blog. Look at those firm hamstrings, those supple and sprightly dancer's toes, and that teasing, gentle prairie of wafting coarse hairs waving to and fro between his ample, yearning man-breasts. He looked even better five minutes ago when he was nursing an elk.

I'd let you get closer, but unfortunately, he packed that diaper full of old river smelt last week, and frankly the gamy, musky effervescence emanating from that corner of the room right now could fell a charging herd of wildebeests in two seconds flat.

Anyway, what we do here at WWHM is analyze men's personal ads. Why do we do that? Well, we do it to make people laugh, and we do it in hopes that somewhere out there men will begin to realize that "Hey, I always complain that women are bitches all the time, but in reality, maybe I'm just a clueless, pathetic excuse for a human being." And 99% of the time, that's exactly what it is. That's why I'm here.

I'm your fearless leader, The Weasel, and I will act as your condom to the internet. If you read WWHM on a daily basis, I promise you the sperm of these men will never drop on anything other than the pages of a glossy magazine, or perhaps your pillowcases if you happen to be out of town for more than three days and you leave a window open.

So I welcome you new readers, and once again I welcome the incredible crew of loyal WWHM'ers who know my schtick all too well by now.

Let's do the posts..............

39 comments:

Nosnikta said...

THANK YOU WEASEL!!!!! (bows in gratitude)

*** I promise you the sperm of these men will never drop on anything other than the pages of a glossy magazine
***

Weasel said...

I'd like to give you lessons on how to say "Twirl Tool" Nosnikta.

Nosnikta said...

LOL.... any time.

I got caught trying to say it as I was walking down the hall yesterday. Our GM stopped and asked me what I was talking about. I giggled, smiled, and knew there was NO way he'd understand. :-D

Cut-N-Jump said...

As they say around here-

"2 seconds is too long."

Of course they are talking about watching kids around water and that 2 seconds is too long to take your eyes off of them, but still...

I think the smell off this guy could drop a herd of wildebeasts in a much shorter time span.

You're generous Weasel!

2 seconds is too long!

Nosnikta said...

I can't help myself, but every time I look at this guy I have the incredible urge to poke him with a stick.

Is it just me?

Unknown said...

This was some kind of personal ad, yes? Please tell me it wasn't.

Nosnikta said...

(poke... poke)

Cut-N-Jump said...

Nosnikta- I can bet he was wanting to poke something with HIS stick, but after posting a pic like this I doubt he will ever, EVER get the chance!

Is it just me or does he remind anyone else of Peter Griffin? From Family Guy...

Hey Lois, remember the time I put on one of Stewies diapers and sat in the corner and shit myself? hahahahahahaha.

Nosnikta said...

roflmao.... HE DOES LOOK LIKE HIM!

Is that a toupee'?

He's just so pale and soft looking. I imagine finding something like him dead in the woods when I'm out riding.

fuglyhorseoftheday said...

I think I saw this dude on Jerry Springer!

Cut-N-Jump said...

Please Weasel! I am begging you to post at least one more. that way when I click to this page to check the other posted comments I am not greeted by this guys picture, think of Peter Griffin and hear that damn laugh-

hahahahahahahaha.

Nosnikta said...

YEAH! I keep flipping back to this page and I'm waiting for someone to walk in to my office, see this guy, and wonder what the hell I'm up to now!!!!!

I'll have large soft rug-totin' diaper-boys flocking in to visit me.

I better go FIND A STICK!

CaliGirl9 said...

Ya know Weasel, it's a good thing you avoided using the word "retard" to describe this winner.
Or else you'd have Tim Shriver crawling up your boxers ...
Just call me Ms. Sensitivity or the Queen of Political Uncorrectness.

Cut-N-Jump said...

He sorta has that weird- "Aw SHIT! Mom just walked in and I am sooo busted!", look on his face.

Like he is suprised to be having his obviously 'posed for' picture taken.

Coz, ya know us women find that just so hard to resist.

*hork*

Anonymous said...

I'm so traumatized by this.... *willing self to not have nightmares* It's like a really bad wreck, I can't stop looking at it... EEEEK.

Black Money said...

I think this kid forgot to grow up, either that or his mum never toilet trained him. Either way, EIW!

Lynda said...

I will never get this out of my head... everytime I watch family guy I'l think of this dork....

I almost hope he's high on something and his friends thought this was funny... cause if he's not high or drunk... ewwwww.

Mack Truck said...

Actually ladies, I don't think this is part of a personals ad.

This guy looks to have Down Syndrome. If he does and Weasel is using his picture to make fun, shame on Weasel.

I'm reserving comment until I hear otherwise.

wheelin126 said...

I don't think he has Downs Syndrome it looks like he has really thick glasses. That might explain why he can't see how ridiculous he looks. Pillsbury Doughboy in Depends...wow where do I sign up for that one!! I wonder if he changes his own or he expects you to do that...lol

Cut-N-Jump said...

Not Downs Syndrome looking to me either...

Just seriously sad and delusional would be more the outcome from this camp.

Maybe he has appeared on Springer, since he does seem to find the weirdest of the weird to feature there- Fetishes anyone? I have heard of people having the fetish to dress and act as infants.

I'm with wheelin now- who is expected to change the diaper?

I know it won't be ME!

Cut-N-Jump said...

Weasel is our usual Monday/Thursday postst going to be Tuesday/Friday from now on?

Just checking...

I was hoping after watching Family Guy last night that I wouln'd have to stare at the real life, diaper clad- otherwise naked, Peter Griffin this morning.

Oh, and Nosnikta- last night they showed a clip where Peter was Jaba the Gut.

I about fell out of my chair!

High degree of difficultly for that manuver since it is a recliner with my belly and all.

Cut-N-Jump said...

Sorry for the misspellings...

Weasel said...

Mack-

This was part of a personal ad- I just found the pic and posted it without an ad. There are tons of fake ads out there, it may have been just that- a fake ad or possibly a real one.

I don't know if this guy has Down's Syndrome or not. If you guys want me to remove it, I will.

I can't please everyone all of the time- it's just so strange that I could make this blog SO much more offensive than it is, but I try to just keep it in good fun- and some people still get offended.

If you guys want it gone I'll get rid of it.

Anonymous said...

Weasel,

Looking at that photo scars the psyche. If you do remove it, that should be your only reason for doing so.

Cut-N-Jump said...

I don't care if it gets removed or kept, just post some new fodder for us to snack on and push this further down the page... two birds with one stone.

That will make us happy and we will return you to your kingdom.

Mack Truck said...

Naw Weasel, you can keep it up. As long as it was part of an ad, I don't have a problem with it.

I just didn't think it should be up if it was in fact some guy with Down Syndrome.

Yeah, I have a SENSITIVE side when it comes to special needs people. Regular stoopid people though, no mercy!

Nosnikta said...

ROFLMAO!

*** Oh, and Nosnikta- last night they showed a clip where Peter was Jaba the Gut. ***

No way!!!!! Maybe the producers read this blog!

Cut-N-Jump said...

Nos-
I would hope if they did they would comment at least!

Maybe offering Weasel a job(!) so he no longer has to worry about flashing cleavage or walking into an interview with his wang hanging out instead...

Nosnikta said...

If we see an episode on man-cleavage and wang-hanging... then we KNOW they read this blog!

(still picturing you and your preggo belly falling out of the recliner lmao... been there myself)

Cut-N-Jump said...

Nos- maybe we could send them a link. You know ofering them ideas for future episodes...

In turn, they could offer Weasel a job. It could happen.

Maybe a mention in an episode, an explosion in readers/posters, and a job offer that way...

Nosnikta said...

Ooooo Oooooooooo! We could get Weasel a job and we could get by-lines lmao!!!!! (snort)

Omg... MAYBE.. they could draw caricatures of us and use us in the series lmao!

I have cute hair and big teeth lmao.... very caricature-worthy.

Cut-N-Jump said...

Only thing I fear is Weasel getting a job, becoming famous and this blog goes kaput.

You wouldn't do that to us, would you Weasel? Please say No...

I will send them an email and a link. I would bust up hearing the blog mentioned in an episode even if that was as far as it went...

wheelin126 said...

I remember they did have a guy on Jerry Springer wearing a diaper and the woman/wife? that loved him. The sick shit pissed himself in his diaper on stage and then wanted to be changed and yes his woman did the changing of him!! It was right after that I changed the channel...eewww

Cut-N-Jump said...

Wheelin- More power to you! I couldn't have watched.

Of course I wouldn't have married him, but if I had, I would have made his sorry ass go to the bathroom and clean himself up- the first time!

I doubt there would have ever been a repeat performance. Had there been, I would have been gone.

I think Oprah once had on people who liked to dress as infants, had adult sized bottles, pacifiers, highchairs- all the accessories.

Another episode was women who wore their wedding dresses every day while watching their wedding video. The couldn't accept the thought that it was ONE day and already over.

I don't know whether that is sick or just sad!

wheelin126 said...

I was very repulsed by a grown man that could go to the bathroom but chose not to an in front of millions of people piss himself in a diaper...hell I wasn't a big fan of changing my daughters diaper when she was a baby (of course I did it unless I could pawn it off on someone else hahaha).

How did you say that...imagine him all hot and sweaty posed over you ready to cum..EEEWWWWWWW!!!!!! Just made myself ill again!! I need something stronger than brain bleach now.

Anonymous said...

Mack Truck, I agree with you. Looks like someone's personal attendant took a picture and used it in a fake ad.

Cut-N-Jump said...

With a pic like that, something tells me, in his mind, he hasn't reached puberty yet, so no worries about that getting hot, sweaty or anywhere near cumming.

Nosnikta said...

(poke poke poke)

wheelin126 said...

LMAO!!!

Nosnikta said...
(poke poke poke)

Thinking of Pillsbury Doughboy laughing being poked in belly!!