Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Hate Mail

Reader KH writes in:

It's a shame you choose to operate a blog that expends so much effort demeaning others and making fun of people incapable of defending themselves. How sad it is you put down these poor men.

What could have been an opportunity to provide elevated discourse on the relationships between men and women, you have chosen the lowest route by filling your blog with crude sexual remarks and humor I'd expect from 12 year old boys. You should be ashamed of yourself. I hope you find the joy you seek in putting others down to make yourself feel better.

I posted a remark on (website deleted) following yours informing others of the disgusting nature of this blog. I will try to get your link removed as well as I have contacted the owner of the website.

KH

KH,

I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you over your loud plaid shirt, wooden clogs, and the clanging of the carpentry tools hanging from your toolbelt. Could you repeat the question?

KH, I want you to take a look at Tim, the CEO and President of Tim's Hairy Snack Shack in the post above this one. Tim has relegated you, a woman, to nothing but the amount of hair on your vagina. To him , that is all you are. You are not a woman, a person, and you have no intelligence, no emotions, and no aspirations, nothing. You have been reduced to an irrelevant being, qualified only by whether or not you shave your pussy. Make you feel good? You may have noticed my commentary was more angry than funny.

Then you write me a letter defending him, that I'm making fun of these "poor men". In ads like these, I'm defending you KH, you ignorant ass. My blog was created as a comedy outlet where I take pokes at everybody, but at the same time I can defend women against the pieces of absolute shit like Tim who feel entitled to treat you as nothing but a fucking pussy that should be crawling and begging him to let you have his cock after he treats you like a piece of fucking garbage.

Do you realize that now? I'm defending you KH. Every woman, like this one, should put up their own blog and plaster the real ads of some these fucktards all over the place to make fun of them, and maybe guys would start to realize that posting a huge picture of their cock and a note that says "come suck me you know you want it" isn't attractive. And for the record, the ads I put on here are nothing. I have seen ads that literally make me angry or want to puke. And I'm not fucking kidding.

In fact, the worst ones are lucky I don't show their faces, because under all legal avenues, I am allowed to show their faces. I didn't post their ads on the internet, they did, in public forums. But I don't want to be a person that ends marriages and ruins kids, because I guarantee 75% of these guys are married. How's your husband KH?

I don't even want to embarrass anyone. I just want to have fun.

In most of my posts, I simply mock the conventional stereotypes. I mock the nerds, the old men, the fetishists, the young boys trying desperately to get laid, the too-nice guys, the thick-in-the-head, the stereotypical middle-aged horny man who hasn't been in the game for a while, and guys who should probably think a little more about the pictures they put in an ad. It's all satire, I'm making fun of them, so what? They can't be identified unless they stand up and say "Hey! That's me! That's my ad!" And if they do, I'll take it down. No one knows who they are. Christ, you should see how pathetic I am when I'm trying to get laid.

So I'll make you a deal KH. You go ahead and put up your blog to "elevate the discourse on the relationships between men and women", and I'll provide you with a link to your fascinating website for all to see, and see what kind of traffic you get with your dry, terse analysis of a subject that fucking bores the shit out of everybody unless we spice it up with some fucking laughs.

See, some people, KM, are a little more open-minded than you. Some of us don't get excited at the absolute fucking hilarity you find in LOLcats.

In the meantime, stop visiting WWHM. You've logged on four times, so you must not hate it that much.

40 comments:

tal said...

LOL well said! I love this site and I love what you do! I visit it every night and laugh my ass off! :)

Perry said...

Well said!! Aren't trackers just the shit? lol

Anonymous said...

Well done! As someone else said earlier....emails like this prove you've grown. You've got an audience now, son. Real writing has a tendency to elicit emotional responses. Sometimes laughing until you pee your self just a little. And sometimes, in the case of frigid humorless douche bags....hate mail.

Either way, you are touching nerves. Which means you are doing a hell of a job.

Keep it up.

~Jilly

Weasel said...

How the hell do you guys get to these so fast?? I JUST put it up.

Are you Evelyn Wood speed-readers?

Weasel said...

Thank you! Today was the first day the fucking rain came down on me.

What's stupid is I got 107 emails yesterday alone praising this blog as hilarious. (thanksbtw) And I focus on the three pieces of hate mail.

Stupid.

Rozie said...

Well Said Weasel :)
I have no idea why some stupid arsehole would want to defend these losers. Especially those like the one who wanted to change womens tampons (That is so fucked up in the head) or the dirty clothed filthy pig who wanted a gang bang with his two band mates. Doesn't the hate mail sender get the fact that some of the men featured on here think a woman is nothing but a hole to relieve themselves in? Thank god there are tons of terrific men out there too.Hate mail senders please wake up and stop defending or making excuses for the pigs.

Jewil said...

I don't think KH has really read the posts. If she had surely she would not want to help these men! Why do I have a feeling KH is in a polygamy sect? Oh wait those women are not allowed on the internet are they?

bibliotecaria said...

"...you have chosen the lowest route by filling your blog with crude sexual remarks and humor I'd expect from 12 year old boys."

At least 12 year old boys have a sense of humor.

Move along KH and keep your comments to things you understand – like kittensandpuppiesaresocuteiwanttopuke.com. Leave this site to those of us who are out there, on the battleground of dating, and have actually ended up in bed with a man who has taken Viagra for no other reason than to try to prove he’s some kind of sex machine. Let’s just say it’s not a pleasant experience to have sex with a perfectly healthy 32 year old man who has taken Viagra – it’s simply not natural.

Weasel, you are FUCKING hilarious.

So, beat it KH!

*Amber* said...

Oh god, you can see how many times I visit?! Shit. Must. do. work.

KH is just pissed because she met her husband after seeing his dick on the internet and falling in "love at first sight". Maybe later he shaved her initial into his man-crop as a wedding proposal.

AvenueFog said...

Yeah, how dare you make jokes at the expense of these men who clearly are of high moral caliber?

*head desk*

Walk On said...

All I'll say that if she thinks these guys are actually decent human beings worth screwing, she's welcome to every single one of them.

I'm suspecting Miss Sensitivity hasn't had a lot of real world experience....or maybe it's Mr. Sensitivity and he's one of the ones featured?

CutNJump said...

Rozie-
Hate mail senders please wake up and stop defending or making excuses for the pigs.


No, no, no, no, no.....

Instead, do the rest of us a favor and find these losers and put out for them. Just DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT reproduce! By any means.


Then rest of US can find the decent men that ARE left in the world...

colorisnteverything said...

My gender studies prof would be proud. I think you basically are a feminist. That is why this blog is so ironic and hilarious. You are a male feminist using baudy humor to make your point.

The Half-Assed Blog said...

Yee-haw! You get 'em Weasel!

Personally I'm encouraged that someone is taking the time to point out the asshattery going on in M4W ads. (and doing it in a hilarious manner is a bonus)

Unfortunately I'm in college where the testosterone runs high and common sense (or hell, decency) seem to be hard to find.
People wonder why I'm not dating.
I'm going to point them to this blog.

furnacelady said...

I'm dumbfounded by the comments that lady made. Really now, how could she possibly think guys that post this shit need defending? Get a sense of humor lady….

I loved your response Weasel, especially the link to drive the point home. Hey like you said, they leave themselves open to ridicule when they post their crap in and open forem.

Don't let assholes like this get to you.

The Hatter said...

Lets do some simple math. KH should be able to handle that.

Men + no common sense + sex = Fodder for the rest of us snarky bloggers that are disgusted at the lengths that some guys will go to just to fucked.

water_bearer said...

Ahhh. You know when the hate mail has arrived, so have you. This is why I don't think I could handle my own blog. Every time I get an email from some far right-wing nut job telling me why they know Obama's a Muslim terrorist because they have a quote from the Bible to prove it, or some equally out of touch with reality so-called "truther" telling me that they have proof 9-ll was an inside job, I feel compelled to rattle off a 5 page dissertation on why I know they're a double-digit IQ, certifiably crazy fucktard if they really believe that and if I were the type to pray, I'd say a prayer every night that they're incapable of reproducing, or at least, voting. I promptly send that response not only to them, but to all the other people they've forwarded that email to when they sent it to me, AND to all the unfortunate souls whose email was included in the body of the message amongst the history of those who've received it earlier because no one knows how to hit the backspace button, or use 'bcc.' You will not find a description of this method in any chapter of "How to Win Friends and Influence People." Invariably while I receive some "bravo" thank-you emails from a few strangers, I receive just as many from people who think I'm a big fat meanie and while they've mustered up enough courage to tell me why, they want me to know that from now on they've "blocked" me. This only encourages me more, as it should you.

Just as the person who is dumb enough to believe that Microsoft / Mars Candy / Disney or whathaveyou is going to send them free chocolate bars for life when they forward an email has every right to perpetuate nonsense like that by sending me same email, I have the right to reply to them and tell them they're an idiot... as does the person telling me I'm a bad person for breaking with tradition and not just ignoring the email have every right to tell me they think I'm rude, as do I have a right to reply to them and tell them I'm not in the business of lying to my friends or the type to enjoy misleading the masses by getting them to believe in some b.s. rumor... and so on and so on and so on. The same freedom you enjoy in sharing your wit and wisdom in any manner you choose, and that those of us who were lucky enough to find your blog enjoy from reading it (despite the fact that you've twice made me snort coffee out of my nose from laughing), is also enjoyed by those who feel compelled to tell you why you shouldn't.

When you receive hate mail like the one posted, I would consider it a badge of honor. Forwarded emails, anything on Craigslist or Ebay, personal ads... it doesn't matter - if it's posted in a public forum, it's fair game for ANYONE to rip apart in just as public a manner as it was originally posted. This is free speech at its finest, I would argue. I enjoy your blog immensely. As long as nothing worse than the feelings of someone who disagrees with you are hurt, it's ALL fair game. And as long as the hate mail never outnumbers the kudos, there should never be any doubt in your mind that your writing is right on target. The majority of us who have neither your talent for snark nor the dedication to maintain a blog would sorely miss your seemingly endless capacity to comically point out the ridiculous lengths to which the illiterate and unfuckable will go to get laid, and the irony in this world that continually allows people like that to reproduce somehow anyway. Keep up the good work. And yes… in case you’re wondering: I am a woman, and I did find you on FHOTD.

gemtwyst said...

INCAPABLE OF DEFENDING THEMSELVES?

Jesus titty f*cking Christ.

There is NOTHING defensible about them or what they write.

Hey, KH, if you feel so damn sorry for them, why not put their dicks in your mouth so that they leave the rest of us alone?

fuglyhorseoftheday said...

>>So I'll make you a deal KH. You go ahead and put up your blog to "elevate the discourse on the relationships between men and women", and I'll provide you with a link to your fascinating website for all to see, and see what kind of traffic you get with your dry, terse analysis of a subject that fucking bores the shit out of everybody unless we spice it up with some fucking laughs.<<

That's about the size of it with my blog, too. Nobody cared about responsible horse breeding until I started talking about it using a lot of snark and profanity.

As I always say, nobody makes them put this stuff on the Internet! Myspace alone is proof that no one in this country has any taste or good sense. They deserve what they get!

Bitch Around the World said...

Someone already beat me to it, but 12 year old boys are fucking hilarious. I'm grown up now, "educated," "sophisticated," etc., but Beavis and Butthead is still some of the funniest shit around.

The Half-Assed Blog said...

Fugly makes a point of it as well.
If weasel went over these posts analysing them like a psychologist it would be boring as hell. Complete with the soft crickets of a hot summer night echoing in the background.

It gets really funny when you just pull out all the stops and type whatever the hell you want. Viva la internet!

It's also a bonus when the blogger uses the correct spelling. I can't laugh at anything that's tyP3D l1k3 th!s, U kno.

Liz said...

Weasel, would you marry me? lol

Kokorami said...

Biblio--stuff like this is WHY I left "the battleground of dating". And I wasn't even hunting through personals--or at all when I found some little beauties (acually, they find me). That doesn't mean I don't find this ROTFLMAO hysterical.

Whiners--Has he put up their names? No. SS numbers? No. Addys? No, again. -PPPPPPTTT- Do not pass go, do not collect $200.

Gemtwyst--Okay, now YOU made me pee. But that'd leave her hands free; she could still type and be a PITA--even if the, um, charming gents dredged up for our enjoyment were temporarily occupied.

Weasel--Don't you dare let the twat-waffle who sent it pee in your cornflakes. It's almost as funny as some of the ads! As for the last (Hairball Man): Congratulations. You actually left me completely unable to comment on something.

Goldie said...

This woman needs to STFU, mind her own business, and go back to knitting sweaters for her cats. You are a godsend to all women everywhere, Weasel. These maladjusted men need a wake up call that life is not a porno where getting a woman is as easy as showing her a picture of your nasty, greased-up cock *shudders*.

Keep doing what you are doing!

The Half-Assed Blog said...

Holy cow- I need the eyebleach after that Desperately Seeking blog.

How in a million years would someone ever think that was attractive?

wheelin126 said...

LOL funny how you have to tell her to quit logging on since she's sooo unhappy about what you are doing..what a dumbass!! Whatever you do DO NOT stop...we want more!! Depends are counting on it..their stocks have risen since finding this site..lol

Weasel said...

Thank you guys- this site will not stop. In fact, I want to see more sites like this.

And yes, I will marry you. But let me send you a pic first.

CutNJump said...

This reminds me of a guy I know. He is in California. He works for a company thay buys from the company I work for.



He has done the singles ads, online dating- (e harmony, match.com and the like) singles cruises, speed dating, singles adventure clubs, is involved in the singles group at his church and who knows what else?

He was telling me one time (as if I had no clue) about the Billions of dollars spent in the US on dating and finding Mr/Mrs Right instead of Mr/Mrs Right NOW. Then he asked me- "Why do you think that is? Why do people spend so much money to find their lifetime companion?"

My answer was short. One word in fact-

"Desperation?!"

The phone got really quiet. It was creepy, eery quiet for a few moments.

I don't think he liked my answer...

Chezza said...

Hey....I like lolcats AND you....what kind of person does that make me? DO I need meds? LOL

MinxyQ said...

Oh, bloody hell, I have a weekend and looks what happens?....I miss all the fun!!

Good to see the FHOTD picket line outside the WWHM headquarters had some effect.

BTW Weasel, looking at all the love you have here, I better set a bit of reality - "I hate you, Weasel"...but you know it is in that grade 4 punch-in-the-arm kinda way, complete with running away and giggling.

Now I have to catch up with all I have missed.

all-canadian said...

Hey man, this blog is awesome, but don't diss the lolcats!

I haz a sad.
lol.

Maryann said...

I completey agree, this boring, soulless bitch needs to grow a sense of humor. This blog is a laugh-until-you-shit riot.

But I have a bone to pick with you on two points:

1. I like this blog and LOLCats. I have just about pissed myself laughing at both. Can't a girl have two sides to her personality?

Yes she fucking can, thankyouverymuch.

2. You don't need to defend us, Weasel. Don't pretend this blog is about sooo much more than laughs, because... dude... we know better. We're grown-ups, not damsels in distress, and we're capable of spotting bad personal ads on our own.

If you were actually attempting to save us from something, you'd be posting the worst of the worst and showing us their faces. I can smell your bullshit from here.

I believe this blog is largely about leaving your chauvinism at the door. I don't think you should be trying to teach lessons you haven't learned, yourself.

Why would you even feel the need to justify yourself with anything, let alone knight-in-shining-armor hypocrisy, to this rank twat? What have you got to lose from letting her panties be in a bunch?

What I'm trying to say here is, this blog gets un-fucking-funny *really* fast when you lie about its purpose and falsely patronize women. So, please don't.

*retracts bloody talons*

Weasel said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I feel that you have properly served this jackass, as it should be. Please please please keep the laughs coming. Your site gives me more pleasure than any man ever has (apologies to my boyfriend). -M

VA Prisoner said...

aw poor Weasel! I'm sorry idiots give you flak like that for this awesome site. But I'm also strangely pleased because it gave you the chance to superbly blast the hell out of KH and us the chance to read it. Seriously, I love this blog. I stumbled onto it from Jezebel and the only thing I regret it coming to it so late in the game.

El-Mango said...

I love you Weasle

Anonymous said...

Gorgeous blog, Weasel!

I can't stop reading it, and my productivity level at work proves that.

As a self proclaimed "modern feminist" (whatever the fuck that is - I think it means I can change my own oil, earn a paycheck, bake a mean cake, and screw my husbands brains out with equal enjoyment and aplomb), it's awesome to see your brilliant mix of intelligence about what women find attractive and toilet humor!

Ah, satire. A delicious, but dying talent.

Thank you, sir. Thank you!

totalblammblamm said...

Oh fucking hell to the yeah.

You tell her. I love this site, yes I'm a new reader, and I'm 'necroing' an old post but I felt like I needed to give you feedback here and now.

Your comments about these dickwads (yes and probably married, many of them) are spot on, concise, clever, very funny, and real. To call the subjects of your derision 'misogynists' is giving them too much credit! You keep right on embarrassing, poking fun at, and humiliating their corny asses, there's a world of old (and new) fans out here that support you 1000%!!

Keep on keeping on! You are defending me, as a woman, and my daughter, who will soon enough (ok, she's only six) be tossed into the world of dating.

Looking forward to new snark,

Your newly dedicated fan,

Zan

Storm said...

I grew up with my mom, the newspaper editor. She constantly tells her reporters that if someone isn't mad at you every week, you haven't been doing your job. I'm pretty sure the same applies to blogs.

Hate mail means you've been doing your job, getting people to take notice, and doing it in a hilarious wonderful way.

Its been a long time since you posted this (I've been reading your entire blog backwards), but you just have to learn to be amused by hate mail. I personally find it hilarious.

Anonymous said...

Several years later, your blog is still hitting the mark. Thank you!