Welcome ladies and gents, from the beautiful corporate headquarters of WWHM in lovely downtown Dubuque, Iowa!
We're coming down off a mean heroin bender today, but we finally got that crack-smoking chimney of a transvestite hooker out of the janitorial closet, so we're ready to go to work. Give him/her three dollars and throw him/her in the dumpster, boys.
You know, people always want to know how I land more female birds than a coke-fueled housecat, when, on the surface, I have all the charisma of a discarded and mold-spotted sandwich bag.
Because folks, I wear clothes purchased from the catalogue of International Male magazine.
And today, as a special treat, I'm going to share with you some of my bird-bagging outfits that the ladies can't get enough of.
That's right, it's our first WWHM Fashion Guide, led by myself, the Weasel. It's a two-pager!
If you guys enjoy this first installment, please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and let me know. If it's a success, we'll have another installment coming up in a couple months with your submissions! Let's roll!