Wednesday, July 9, 2008

It's A Dirty Job



Any Ladys Looking For Some Oral ?

My girlfriend wont let me give her oral so im looking for a girl to eat out between the ages of 18-25 im 6 and a half feet tall work wonders with my hands if you like a guy who goes to work and comes home with dirty and cut up hands im your guy! Sam


Sam, do you ever notice clicking noises when you walk around town?

That's neither grasshoppers nor gossiping Nbele tribesman my friend, it's the sound of every woman in a 25-foot radius of you locking their vaginas shut with the latest of Schlage's orifice security technology.

You could tie those locked female legs to two horses and have them charge in opposite directions, and those legs would stay sealed shut like an Oscars envelope. You're that disgusting.

Luckily I'm quite a ladies man. Not in that they'll have ever sex with me, but I'm lucky to share in some of their intimate conversations on occasion as we have pillowfights, trade bras, and giggle over the latest issue of Teen Beat magazine. Oh, the things they tell me.

Did you know that if you shower every day but don't wash your balls, your taint will smell like someone put a bag of river smelt in a breadbox and left it out in the Cairo sun for a fortnight?

Did you know if you plug your tongue down her throat like your mining for bauxite in her spleen on the first kiss, you'll never even see her kneecaps in the light of day?

And finally, did you know women would rather gargle a glass of rusty fishhooks than let a man put his dirty, and for the love of God, cut up, hands inside of her?

Here's an idea. Try sticking your dirty, cut up fingers into your own ass, and watch it involuntarily pucker itself shut like a bank vault.


13 comments:

anniebanannie said...

Fuckin'A! This blog should have a warning that you should have recently voided your bladder or be prepared with Depends...

What a moron. I guess there might be some woman somewhere that would be turned on by cut up fingers...

Anonymous said...

Oh God. Oh GOD.

This...this ad was just PATHETIC.
And disgusting. I...I fear for anyone on my half of the species who would even consider answering this ad. D:

*Amber* aka Suzy SINsation said...

Is anyone else wondering why the hell there are so many swirlies on this one?

CaliGirl9 said...

Okay, I know of a 17-year old kid who actually went to a "house of ill repute" in Nevada for his first sexual experience and choose to give the gal oral sex ... with nothing coming back to him. Couldn't find a local girl to "date" so he went out of state LOL
Obviously he'd missed that talk with his dad or something ... what intercourse is and where his penis should have gone! His friends just died laughing when he bragged about how he wasn't a virgin anymore.
Gah! Men ... obviously they don't have to try too hard to be dumb as posts sometimes!

wheelin126 said...

Caligirl9 - Well at least his tongue wasn't a virgin anymore

Anonymous said...

Sweet JESUS.

Just have to say that any woman who actually answers this so totally deserves the infection she'll get for it. SERIOUSLY.

Ugh ugh ugh. I don't even need Schlage's orifice security technology right now, I'm doing just fine by myself.

Anonymous said...

"Did you know if you plug your tongue down her throat like your mining for bauxite in her spleen on the first kiss, you'll never even see her kneecaps in the light of day?"

KNEECAPS???!!! ROFLMAAAAOOOO!!!

Your dose of lunacy said...

I swear, an origami swan has a better idea of what turns women on than some of these guys.

Anonymous said...

It is very interesting for me to read that blog. Thanx for it. I like such topics and everything that is connected to them. I definitely want to read a bit more on that blog soon.

Anonymous said...

Keep on posting such stories. I like to read articles like that. BTW add some pics :)

Ink said...

Dude Not Only is he CHEATING the DUDE's DISGUSTING - NO Guy Or Girl Would love to have their privates being fondled by someone whose hands are unhygienic! Eat Pussy but Productively!

Quân Đào said...

nhận làm dịch vụ kế toán thuế trọn gói nhận làm báo cáo tài chính tín
trung tâm đào tạo kế toán tại tphcm gia
khóa học kế toán thực hành re
công ty dịch vụ kế toán
dich vu ke toan thue tai bac ninh
dịch vụ kế toán trọn gói tại hà nội
dịch vụ kế toán tại tp.hcm
dịch vụ báo cáo thuế
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế uy
trung tâm đào tạo kế toán tại tphcm
trung tâm đào tạo kế toán tại cầu giấy tín
trung tâm đào tạo kế toán tại long biên
trung tâm đào tạo kế toán tại hà đông re
trung tâm kế toán tại thanh xuân
trung tâm kế toán tại bắc ninh
trung tâm kế toán tại bình dương
trung tâm kế toán tại hải phòng
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận bình thạnh
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận tân phú
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận 5
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận 3
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại tphcm
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận cầu giấy
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận long biên
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận hà đông
dịch vụ quyết toán thuế tại quận thanh xuân

Anonymous said...

¿Estás hablando de una muñeca sexual? Acabo de comprar a una mujer con un gran culo en 24buydoll.com